When Guys Leave Quietly: Becoming Men Who Notice
He was gone– I knew it. An integral piece of the men’s group. And he left quietly. With this one, I did get the benefit of closeout conversation and a kind of resolution. Busy life, a lot of stuff happening, and no more capacity. I understood. But often, this doesn’t happen. I lead a local…
Redeemed
Wandering, lost, homeless, sitting in gloom and darkness, bound with chains, imprisoned, rebelling, suffering, terrified, distressed. Dying. “Lord, help!” Rescued, led to safety, broken chains, healed, saved, satisfied, filled with good things, snatched from death. Light. LIFE. “Lord, Help!” To me, these two words, repeated in Psalm 107, reflect a separation between two different conditions…
When I Forget What Matters Most
I want your approval. I want you to accept me. If I am honest, I want this a lot of […]
The Contenders
I’m absolutely fascinated with community, and in the book of Philippians, Paul gives one of the best pictures that I […]
Losing What Normal Feels Like — And Learning to Live
I recently sat down for dinner with some men going through divorces. The topic of conversation was loss and grief. […]
The Next Door I Enter
5 a.m. I’m about to start my day, and I find myself wondering, who am I seeing today? I’m thinking about my lineup. I’m a home health physical therapist, and I know who’s on my schedule to be seen today. Some I have already met, some I haven’t. With the unknown ahead, I ask myself,…
8 Ways to Think About Your Mindset in Divorce
If you’re a guy going through divorce right now, especially a conflicted one, then I hope if you found this and are reading it today that you’ve landed in the right spot. And I hope this brings something of value into your situation. Because I’m going to challenge you to think about something: your biggest…
Looking In The Rearview Mirror
This morning I came across two pictures from 2024, two years ago. One is me standing on a bridge. The […]
Becoming Dependent Men
Power. Respect. Recognition. Achievement. The things a man really wants. I recently sat with a man who had accomplished all […]
Becoming Men That Please God
I’m a guy who really does want to follow Jesus and become more like Him each day. But with a […]
Living the “Good Life”: What Do You Expect?
…A homeless man on the run from a raging king, acting like a lunatic in front of an enemy…
Should A Christian Get A Prenup? A Resource For Men.
A resource for men wanting honest help in understanding a decision to pursue (or not pursue) a prenuptial agreement in […]
Compassionate Divorce
Compassionate Divorce How in the world do these two things sit together? Is it even possible? If you are going […]
I Will Not Be Afraid
Friday, August 21, 2026. How kind the Lord is.How good he is.So merciful, this God of mine! I was facing death, and he saved me. Lord, you hear my voice.You heard my prayer for mercy.My cry lifted up to heaven where you sit.I prayed, even to my last breath. Death was on me like a…
My Fickle Heart
Can a man describe his wrestling with God? A helpless struggle between the created and the Divine? Why do I feel like a child running and hiding from a parent? Why do I feel like I’m turning my back on the One who really cares the most about me? How is it possible that my…
Becoming (Real) Neighbors
I’ve been journeying through the book of Luke, following what Jesus is doing and saying. I found myself in the 10th chapter, sitting in a part where an expert in religious law came up to Jesus and asked what he should do to inherit eternal life. The man’s response was, “Love the Lord your God…
What Will It Cost Me?
“I’ll follow you wherever you go.” I can almost imagine saying this to Jesus if I had known Him in […]
Becoming Men Without Dark Corners
I have recently asked a few single people this question: How do you know when you are “relationally ready”? Especially […]
A Look Back At The Storm and Rescue: 3 Years Later
Let me tell you this…three years ago my life started to collapse. I never would have imagined what was going […]
Becoming Honest Men
Hypocrite. I’ve been a big one, and if I am honest, so often am still one. I found myself curious about this topic today, and what it looks like in my life. I want to take a little time to explain what I have learned. A hypocrite is a stage player. An actor. A man…
The Time I Quit. And What I Learned.
May 2005. Illinois State High School Track and Field Championships, 3,200-meter finals. Last race of my high school career. I was lined up in the fast heat against 10 other competitors. And I knew I had no business being there. Through the final two years of high school athletics, I had struggled with injuries. An…
Understanding Worship: Part 2
I find myself on the topic of worship and wondering what it really is. Why is understanding worship important? Why […]
What’s A Friend?
Hey guys, I’ve been thinking about friendship lately. For me, this is definitely an area I have not mastered. Is there actually ever a time when we do? Friendship is complicated, unique, complex, and a beautiful thing. Understanding friendship, I believe, is a critical part of understanding who we are. I’ve taken some time to…
When It’s Hard to Ask Her for Help
Connecting Men Series As I’ve been exploring the topic of men and connection, one of the best places I can […]
Our Messy, Beautiful Table: What Men Lose, and Gain, In Divorce
Redeeming Divorce Series. An article for MEND Collective– from a Men’s Divorce Dinner, Charleston SC, mendcharleston.com This month, I bought a table— the first big piece of furniture I’ve purchased since my divorce. Last night, I had the opportunity to sit around that table with eight other men who were going through or had gone…
The Hidden Man: A Need to Prove
The Hidden Man Series The comment came out of my mouth without much thought. It was lobbed with a sarcastic chuckle. The response? “Wow, that was a snarky comment.” I had to think about that. Snarky. What does that mean? Looking up the definition of that word, I was honestly disgusted. Disgusted with myself. This…
The Hidden Man: My Deepest Desire
What do I live for? If I am really honest with you, I want your attention. Lurking under much of what I do, I hope to have my back patted. I hope to be noticed. I want recognition. There is a part of me that is always screaming “Look at me!” I want to be…
Connecting Men: How The Church Can Help
I’ve had quite a few conversations with men who have felt dismissed, ignored, or overlooked by “the church”. Men going through hard times who have wanted support and connection but have not found it within the walls or programs offered by a church they tried to connect with– and they have left disconnected. The point…
The Foundations of Men’s Community
I’ve been considering how healthy men’s communities form, grow, and develop. They’re kind of like living, breathing organisms. They can […]
The Care Behind The Care
This morning I had the opportunity to put together some admission folders for our new patients. They receive these when the first clinician steps through their home and begins providing care. As I was putting them together, I found myself reflecting on the core principles of the company I work for: compassion, excellence, and reliability.…